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Relationships Matter - Colossians 3:18 - 4:18

 Friday, August 28 –

We come to Friday, and finish our reading in the letter to the Colossians, reading Colossians 3:18 – 4:18. You’ll recognize in your reading some similar instructions Paul had written to the Ephesians.  After you finish reading the passage, come back, and we’ll walk through it together.

 

Looking back at where we’ve come from in chapter 3, you’ll recognize a cluster of three areas of instruction based on relationships.  Like the book of Ephesians, Paul first wrote of the doctrinal, or theological aspects of their faith, and then beginning in chapter 3, started his teaching on practical Christian concerns.  This spills over into today’s readings, and we can get a big picture by noticing the differing sections – starting with some of yesterday’s reading:

·         Christians in relationship with Jesus, 3:1-8

·         Christians in relationship with other believers (the church), 3:9-17

·         Christians in their family relationships, 3:18-21

·         Christians in their work relationships, 3:22 – 4:1

·         Christians in their neighbor relationships, 4:2-6

We covered the first two yesterday, and today we look at the final three.  Third, in this series of relationship instructions is the Christian in their family life.  There is a lot of similarity to Ephesians 5:21 – 6:4, although this is much more abbreviated.  In short, concise sentences, he repeats instructions to wives, husbands, children, and masters/employers.  The two sentences of wives and husbands need to be kept together.  Having just said, “let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts” (3:15), we have the perfect attitude to approach wife and husband's needs and responsibilities.  A husband leads in sacrificially loving his wife, and his wife responds with trust and submission.  The picture in Paul’s mind – I’m convinced – is of Christ Jesus’ relationship to the Father.  The Father said, “this is my beloved Son,” and the Son “emptied himself,” becoming obedient to the Father’s will that led him to the Cross.  The command to the husband to “not be harsh,” reflects the Roman culture that wives had to endure.  Paul’s instructions would have modeled something quite different than most Roman households.

The responsibility of parenting is similar in tone – “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord” (3:20) is followed by “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged (3:21).  The word Paul uses for discouraged is translated in other translations as “exasperate.”  We seldom use that word in our vocabulary but is a better word for translating the original word.  The Greek word is “erethizo,” and it means to “become spiritless,” or “stirred up (to provoke).”  It is a father’s role in discipline to build up, not tear down.  Yet, this is also a reminder that a Father, and Mother, are not to ignore the growth and development of a child’s character and behavior.  The language of parenting, like marriage, is godly when it is full of love and respect on all levels.

“Bondservants, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord” (3:22).  Rome’s culture was structured between the Aristocratic elite (the Patricians) and the lower class (Plebians), which was more of a middle class of farmers, craftsmen, laborers, and soldiers.  An even lower group included slaves and indentured servants –which normally had no rights.  Women and children lived with the various classes with limited legal rights, except in the case of wealthy Matrons.  Many of the early church Christians who were welcomed into the church were servants – both indentured and slaves.  The word “bondservant” in the ESV compresses both groups together.  Paul has more to say here on this subject than he did of the role of marriage and family life – why?  In chapter 4, we find out that one of the people that sent greetings to the Church was Onesimus.  Paul says of him, “Onesimus is our faithful and beloved brother, who is one of you.”  Onesimus is the subject of the next letter written to Philemon, and he is a runaway slave who came to faith in Christ, and whom Paul is sending back to his master. 

There has been much modern criticism of Paul regarding his comments on slaves, and in particular, Onesimus’ return to his master – Philemon.  The accusation is unfounded when you consider that Roman culture had little regard for slaves.  Paul elevates their position as fellow heirs with Christ in his Kingdom – “Bondservants, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord.  Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.  For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality.  Masters, treat your bondservants justly and fairly, knowing that you also have a Master in heaven” (3:22 - 4:1).
In a modern setting, this would be about employers and employees.  In the first century, this was about servants/slaves and their masters.  The attitude Paul desires is the same in both settings –
do what you do not to please people, but with the heart attitude that seeks to please the Lord,  who both of you – servants/employees and masters/employers – are serving as your real boss, the Lord Jesus Christ” (my paraphrase).

Nearing the end, Paul finishes the way he does in many of his letters. He begins with a few short pieces of instruction.  In a world of tweets, posts, instant messaging, Paul reminds us that words matter – they don’t have to be many to say much.  What we say, write, send has both vertical and horizontal dimensions.  Vertically, we talk to God in prayer – “Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving” (4:2). Then he reminds us that instead of praying in general, be specific in praying (4:3-4) and do it with thanksgiving (4:2b).  

Horizontally, he reminds them that their walk, and talk, matter –
“Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time.  Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person” (4:5-6).
Personally, the wisdom in all of this is crucial to the time we live in.  The destructiveness of communication is not something we should overlook.  What we say, how we say it, and the purpose of it all matter – to others and to God.  The old adage is still true: I have often regretted the words I’ve spoken; I have seldom regretted my silence.   

The final part is Paul and his friends' greetings and blessings to the Colossian church.  Tychicus (4:7) carried the letters to the churches in Colossae and Ephesus, as well as the letter to Philemon (Eph. 6:21,22). Onesimus (4:9) is the slave we will soon meet again.  Aristarchus (4:10) traveled with Paul through Macedonia, and on to Rome (Acts 27:2).  Mark (4:10), who was Barnabas’ cousin but had abandoned Paul on their first mission trip, is obviously in a much different place.  Over time they had reconciled.  Jesus (4:11) is not the Christ as Jesus was a common name in Israel.  Jesus is called Justus, a Jewish believer who has no other mention in the New Testament.  Yet he’s in here in Scripture one more time than you and me!  Epaphras (4:12) was a prayer warrior for Paul and for the Colossian church.  Paul called him a “servant and one of you,” and in all probability was the church’s leading elder.  He not only served the church in Colossae but also the churches in near-by cities of Laodecia and Hierapolis (4:13).  Luke (4:14) is Paul’s record keeper, making notes of all that is happening to write history, but to Paul is he is “my beloved physician.”  He next mentions Demas, 4:14, which is interesting because at this time, he is serving alongside Paul, but later, near the end of Paul’s life, abandoned Paul – probably in fear of his own life (2 Timothy 4:10). 

He addresses one church and two individuals as he concludes – “Give my greetings to the brothers at Laodicea, and to Nympha and the church in her house” (4:15).  The Laodicean church’s notoriety doesn’t appear until the book of Revelation, and then not in a good way.  Most of the early churches were small, and met in homes, sometimes large homes of estates.  Nympha was a matron of the church in Laodecia (4:16).  Interestingly, we have no record of the letter Paul sent to the Laodicean church.
The second individual was a man named “Archippus” (4:17), who Paul admonishes to “fulfill the ministry that you have received in the Lord.”  Only God knows what Paul is referring to.

His farewell consists of his own handwriting, to prove it was from him, a quick prayer request, and a word of blessing – “ I, Paul, write this greeting with my own hand. Remember my chains. Grace be with you” (4:18). 
I have grown to love these final sections in Paul’s letters.  For years I quickly skimmed over them, ignoring people’s names I did not know.  Yet, the world is full of anonymous saints.  Luther, Calvin, Edwards, Augustine, Aquinas, Moody, Spurgeon, Graham, Sproul – they all had those who came alongside and served with them.  Can you think of one person who worked with them?  Most of us can’t.  But we can remember our own anonymous sources of encouragement. Francis Schaeffer said it best, “There are no little people.” [1]  Paul had his unknown people…we read them here and have no face to place with their name – yet there are indeed no little people.

 

Peace



[1] Francis Schaeffer, No Little People, IVP,  page 21, quoted in Swindoll’s book, IBID., page 196.

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