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Dealing Wisely with Widows and Elders - 1 Timothy 5:1 - 25

 Friday, September 11 –

It is the end of the workweek, and we continue to read in Paul’s first letter to Timothy.  Today we will read 1 Timothy 5:1 – 6:2. Again, as always, please come back after you’ve read it if you can. 


Church ministry is an intersection of people who often have needs.  Sometimes the needs are spiritual, but often they are more basic needs – physical, financial, emotional, and relational.  Pastors sometimes become the traffic cop standing in the center of the intersection, directing, and helping keep things safe.  In 1 Timothy 5, Paul reminds Timothy that, as a Pastor, he will have to deal with many different kinds of people, and one after another, Paul gives him advice on what to do and what not to do.  There are six distinct groups of people Timothy will have to deal with:  Older Men (5:1), Younger Men (5:1), Older Women (5:2), Younger women (5:2), Widows (5:3 – 16), and Elders (5:17 – 25).  It’s a lot of different kinds of issues that need to be addressed as a godly leader.

The older men – the word is “presbyteros,” which is the same word for church leaders – “elders.”  They are to be treated with respect, but not without pastoral oversight when needed - “Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father…” (5:1a).  When I first entered into pastoral ministry, I was in my twenties.  Most of the men in the church were much older.  I had a certain amount of stature as the pastor, but I quickly realize these older men were treasures of experience and practical knowledge.  If there was a reason to approach them with something I was bothered with, I quickly learned the value of a question rather than a comment.  Can you help me understand why…?” which invited a response instead of a confrontation.  Authority doesn’t have to be confrontative to work. 
The next group of men Paul speaks to Timothy about are either his age or younger – “younger men (deal with) as brothers” (5:1b).  We’re much more likely to speak to our peers with less formality.  While it might sound like an invitation to be abrupt, Paul reminds Timothy to treat them like a family member.  Yes, be forthright, but not rude, regardless of age or social status. 

Paul moves on to women of equal concern – “older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity” (5:2).  As a young man and pastor, Timothy is reminded to treat these women with the integrity of purity.  It is not just the physical factor, but also the emotional and relational boundaries that have to be clear.  To the older woman, there is an appeal, somewhat like the child to a mother; but to the younger woman, the need is to treat them as a sister.  Over the many years of ministry, I’ve seen too many men in ministry not observe these boundaries, and to the dismay of all, they lost their pastoral ministry.  One can’t help but notice that in all of these concerns, the older men and women, the younger men and women, the various relationships of the church are not just “members” but brothers and sisters, fathers and mothers in Christ.  The church is a family, not a business, and we should deal with people and their needs with integrity and compassion of family at the same time.

A perfect example follows in the care of Widows.  In a lengthy section from 5:3 – 16, Paul outlines various ways in which the Church should deal with widows who are genuinely in need.  The Roman world was a man-dominated authoritarian world.  The Roman population neglected widows.  If they had no family to help, many a widow ended up begging on the streets, or if younger, turning to prostitution.  There was no public assistance, and families were not obligated to provide for older widows.  Paul cared deeply about women, and reading through his letters proves that.  Paul’s command to Timothy is echoed in every church he established – “Honor widows who are truly widows” (5:3).  He divided the widows up into three different categories, and there was only one of the three that qualified to be on the “list.”  First listed were widows with living relatives (5:4-8).  Second was Widows, who were older and not likely ever to remarry (5:9-10, 16). Last of all, there are widows who were still of marriage age (5:11-15). 

Throughout the Bible, widows and orphans were specifically mentioned by God to be cared for and valued for who they are in themselves.  God is described as “a father the fatherless, and a defender of the widow” (Psalm 68:5), and “he defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow” (Deuteronomy 10:18). Jesus demonstrated this godly concern several times.  The Apostles carried this same concern into the church, which was one of the reasons for the appointment of Deacons (Acts 6).  Paul’s charge to Timothy was to “honor” widows.  The Greek word means “to value,” i.e., to give them their proper recognition.  He urges the families of one who is widowed to support the widow by taking care of her needs (5:4).  The family life of the early church was quite different from our western culture.  A woman would have entered into marriage with a family dowry.  In case of the death of her husband, she had two choices – continue to stay under the household of her husband’s family or return back home to her family with the dowry.  Paul is pretty direct in pointing out that if a household does not take care of those within it, they are not acting in accord with the church’s teachings – “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (5:8). 

He argued against the church supporting widows who had families to take care of them (5:4-8), and also argued against support for younger widows who would remarry (5:11-15), but says of widows who are above sixty years of age, and thus unlikely to ever remarry, to be “enrolled” (ESV), or put on “the List” (NIV, and others) as long as they have good standing in the church.  These are “truly widows,” women who are long-term older single women who have no way of financially supporting themselves.  The qualifications for this woman are not only their age, but she also had been a woman who had one husband and had done good things in the church (5:10).  We should note, these widows were long-term in support by the church.  There was no qualifying of short-term support for any of the widows.  Also, one worthy note is that the early church went even further in honoring widows, and by the second century, there are references that the church had the “office of widow” as a part of its structure. [1]  Lastly, Paul’s encouragement to young widows (5:14-15) is to remarry and reminds Timothy in the end that no matter the age or status of a widow, the family is first in terms of responsibility (5:16).

The last section of church order is given over to the Elders, the “Presbyters” of the church.  “Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who labor in preaching and teaching” (5:17). 
As we have seen, Paul interchangeably uses “presbyter” (elder), and “episkope” (Bishop) in his letters, so it’s difficult to discern why he chooses one over the other.  The simple answer might be whether he’s thinking of the Greek word or the Hebrew word when he dictates his letters!  He points out that the church should support the Elders who preach and teach.  Paul’s conviction of this need comes from Deuteronomy 25:4, where the farmer was forbidden to stop his oxen from eating while harvesting the crop.  He had said the same thing to the Corinthian church (1 Cor. 9:9). 

What do we do if the Elder is not worthy of holding the office because of some maleficence?  Paul deals with the inevitable problem that some will not like an elder and complain, or even make charges against them.  In a step by step way, he makes it clear neither to deny looking into the problem, nor let accusations stand if they are deemed untrue.  First, the church must look into allegations when they come (5:19).  Second, if the charge is true, let it be known publicly (5:20).  Lastly, do what needs to be done with integrity and impartiality (5:21).  Biblically, Pastors, Elders, Bishops, whatever the title, must have a high degree of integrity.  The assumption of “is the charge true,” 5:20, is that the investigation either reveals that the leader did do something wrong, or that the leader was falsely accused.  Any accusation doesn’t stand in no man's land without a public response.  The gravity of this finding is so crucial to the health and future of the church that Paul sees the parties as standing before God, Jesus, and the Angels in heaven (5:21). 

There are some last short commands to Timothy to remember.  First, be careful who you select to serve, don’t be hasty, take time to see their life and character before “laying hands on” them (5:22).  The laying on of hands signified the church’s appointment of someone to office, and if done too quickly, it might be later discovered that it should never have been done at all.  We must be careful here as it is the lesson of the iceberg – that 10% of it is visible, and 90% is not.  No one who enters into leadership is perfect, and everyone who leads has their human weaknesses.  We are not looking for perfection in leaders, but for maturity, humility, and character, with wisdom and leadership gifting.  Lastly, he tells Timothy to take care of himself physically (5:23) and reminds him that eventually, all things will come out in the open, so do not obsess in his oversight of those who are appointed to lead (5:24-25). 

Looking back through my 48 years of pastoral ministry, I can see people who grew in their faith and became a tremendous blessing to the church.  I can also see some who were given an office and failed miserably.  Worst of all, I can remember colleagues who entered into ministry and left it for moral or ethical sins.  These are sad days in both the minister, the church’s life, and my own life as a friend.  There have been some success stories of restitution and recovery.  It is by God’s grace that anyone does the work of the ministry, and we hope in Christ to guard our way. 
If you are not in a leadership role, remember to pray for your pastors/elders, or whatever office your church gives to leaders.  Not only pray for the person but also the spouse and kids.  The strain on pastors is sometimes unbelievably difficult.  Also, supporting the pastor(s) of the church with proper financial means is more important than you might know.  I am amazed at church’s who feel a pastor’s salary ought to be modest because “they are to trust the Lord.”  As one brother said to me 40 years ago, “A church who pays their pastor peanuts shouldn’t be surprised that they get a monkey!”  Pastors don’t go into ministry for the money, and even though there are some bad apples in the ministry, most Pastors are just trying to make ends meet.  It’s a wonderful thing to be appointed to ministry, but not always easy.

Peace



[1] Ignatius, in his Epistle to the Philippians, Clement of Alexandria in his book “The Instructor” mentions the Offices of Bishops, Presbyters, Deacons and Widows.

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